4 THINGS EVERY BEARDED MAN HAS HEARD A MILLION TIMES ALREADY
Having a glorious fuzzy beard certainly has it's pluses. They make a great conversation starter at any given occasion. They also catch the eye of almost every woman on the face of the planet, don't even try to play it cool, we see you lookin'!
But with the good, also comes the bad. Well, maybe not so much bad, but certainly a little annoying from time to time. So, today I wanted to have a lighthearted chuckle at some of the more common things us beardsmen get asked. Let us begin as we discuss 4 Things Every Bearded Man Has Heard A Million Times Already...
HEY! HAVE YOU GOT YOUR HEAD ON UPSIDE DOWN?
Ok, so this one might not be relatable to every furry faced gentleman, but for those of us much like myself who are, shall we say, thinning ever so slightly on top and are packing more hair on our chins than we are our heads, it seems everyone's favourite joke is to pick fun at the fact we must be compensating growing out our face fuzz to make up for our lack of hair.
firstly, you aren't the first person to have 'cracked that joke', I've heard it more times then I care to count. So move along Mr nakey face, and keep your Christmas cracker cheap humour to yourself in the future!
YOU MUST BE TOO LAZY TO SHAVE!
Yeah, we're so lazy that we just let bazillions of tiny hairs burst through our faces to form what many might call facial hair, simply because we cannot be arsed to shave. SAID NO BEARDED MAN EVER!
truth be told, maintaining a furry face takes a whole lot of upkeep to keep in tip top condition. There are no shortcuts or fast routes when flourishing out our fuzz. We have to wash, moisturise, balm up and oil our faces on a daily basis.
So whoever first said bearded men were too lazy, clear weren't bearded themselves and have little to absolutely no knowledge on how this furry face thing actually works.
DON'T YOU EVER GET TOO HOT WITH THAT BEARD ON YOUR FACE?
It's a little known fact that many folks might think having a layer of fuzz covering our faces on a hot summer's day would make us a little hot, sweaty, itchy and uncomfortable.
But in all honesty it's quite the reverse effect. having a good layer of facial hair helps protect our faces from potentially harmful sun UV rays, which would otherwise cook us like a fresh t bone steak. There was absolutely no reason for me to be so specific on what cut of meat, I just rather like me some T bone...mmmm mmm m.
CAN I TOUCH IT? PRETTY PLEASE?
Come on fellas, let's be honest, we've all been touched by a stranger at the bar at least once in our fuzzy face lifetime, am I right? or am I right?
And before you start jumping to filthy minded conclusions as to what I mean, I am in fact referring to our beards. Yes, it's true, total strangers often like to have a jolly good fumble of our fuzzy fur-tastic chops, and often ask if they can cop a feel right after they have indeed already started touching it.
Now, I don't particularly dislike or begrudge anyone having a gentle fondle of my ginger fuzzy cheeks every once in awhile (keep it clean!), but it does grind my gears ever so slightly when they reach out and grab a handful before asking.
That's like me going and grabbing me some titties at Hooters, then asking afterwards if that was a cool thing to do. Both of which is of course not, especially my terrible example as this will likely have you arrested and pretty fast. So don't go doing it. Ever.
There goes my Monday musing blog. I sure hope you enjoyed reading. Be sure to share this around with your 'homies' through the power of social media. Afterall sharing is caring. If you have a couple of extra minutes on your hands then please let us have your thoughts, comments and questions in the comments section you'll find provided directly below this post.
And until next time, Beard on Brothers, Beard on...