What My Beard Has Taught Me – Week 2

There are many things that will affect a beard. From the little tricks on how to eat, just simply waking up in the morning and dealing with bed beard, and how there is a sense of Camaraderie between bearded brethren. Learn what my beard has taught me this week to find out how my beard lessons may help you with your own Beard Struggle.

Eating Can be a Pain

Eating food and drinking liquids are a huge a pain. If it is not, please, tell me your secret. I mean I swear to everything sacred and holy that every time I eat one of my wife’s delicious submarine sandwiches she likes to make for me, I feel like I am eating the corners of my mustache. I think one day I am going to pull back from a bite of food and be missing half my mustache. One word, liquids. That in itself should say enough. However, let me go into some detail about the woes of drinking ANYTHING. I am an avid drinker of coffee. What I should say is that I love coffee. I mean, coffee saved my life in Afghanistan so I am extremely loyal to it (hit me up offline if you would like to know how). Yet when I take a sip of that warm, rich, smooth, filmy finish that is called coffee, it dribbles off of my mustache and ends up dripping down the side of my cup and into the creases of my hand. So now everything I touch is now coffee-ridden. Wife loves that… NOT! The best thing I can tell you is buy some Mustache wax. Now I am not talking about some of the Gorilla Glue Mustache wax, I am talking something with a medium hold, that still lets your mustache look like it sits that way naturally. That is unless you are going for the whole Handlebar Mustache, in that regard Charlie Mike or continue mission.

Bed Beard

Bed Beard – it is like bed head for your beard. So do any of you guys roll out of bed in the morning and are GQ right out of the covers. If you do, then I hate you. No just kidding… no not really kidding. If your beard is more than a half of an inch then you probably suffer from this Chronic condition known as Bed-Beard. How I attempt to fix this is to shower in the morning and allow the heat and humidity to release the death grip of beard faux pas. However, what about those times you wake up late? You know you do not have enough time to shower and fix this so what are some tricks? For me, I like to use a conditioner. However, before you run out of your mother’s basement and try to steal her Infinium-23 conditioner, remember that parabens and sulfates are bad. Honestly, use a beard balm with a little bit of water. This turns the balm into slightly sticky putty. Then I Slather that all over my beard and brush it for a minute or two until it has dried up most of the way. It will provide some hold and allow you to style it to perfection.

The Camaraderie of the Bearded Brethren

All my bearded brethren love to share experiences and regale in stories of their own Beard Struggle. I mean we literally will share our daily experiences. I gives me a chance to test my audience before I write my articles. So, if you guys are reading this, shout out to my Bearded Brethren, OT, Patrick, Rob and Joey; you guys are my inspiration. Having a beard is really a conversation starter. If your boss does not have a pencil shoved up his fourth point of contact (who knows maybe he is into that kind of thing), then this is probably how you and your boss first opened a real dialog. I walked up to some random guy at the Tiny Coffee Shop last week and complimented him on the success of his beard. I especially liked how straight he had gotten it. So I informed him of such and next thing you know 45 minutes had gone by and neither of us had drank any of our coffee as of yet. Beards give you something to relate to. They really do. So if you want to have a great conversation starter, then grow some chin scruff and watch the conversations commence. Now disclaimer, if it is only a little scruff it may not get the recognition it fully deserves. It needs to stand out and make a statement. Mine is really long and I am Blonde so I get the nicknames of Suit Viking and Business Thor. Mainly because I like to show that you can have a Beard and still GQ it the hell up. Additionally, I have that Norwegian blood in me to so that may be why I get referred to as Thor. Either way, this gets attention so that works for the conversation piece.

We would love to hear from You!

Got a story to share? Have your own experiences you would like to confer upon? Or maybe you just have a question. Either way, hit me up. I would love to converse about it.  Until next week, Beard on, Brothers!

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